I was talking to an Airbnb guest of mine this morning about love and relationships. Not that I am an expert by any means…I am on my third husband. But we have been together over 30 years and still living life. I am still In touch and friends with my first two husbands. Kindness feels better to me than bitterness and anger.

This woman I was talking to was 33 single very pretty and seemed to be discouraged . Her mother is also single. My sister, older than me by five years never remarried but has certainly tried to find a partner. She is also discouraged. There are other friends and family members in the same boat.

You’re probably wondering what does this have to do with the culinary corner….

Well, when I started my business it came from my passion to please others. When I cook a meal, or bake something to share I do it with love and an intention to please. Nothing warms my heart more than hearing the satisfied mmmm as you take a bite. My father always said his favorite sandwich was one made for him. I never stopped doing that and my business is still going strong all these years later.

So back to the discouraged single people…

If instead of focusing on all that you want or need from a mate start thinking about what you have to give! What you have to offer. It’s really amazing how our needs are met when we are giving rather than seeking fulfillment. Next time you write that profile for your internet dating site talk about the things you have to offer and like to do for your partner. The things you like to share, the places you’d like to experience with them. On that next date find out what really pleases that person instead of telling them what you want. You will be able to determine if you are the one that can fulfill those desires.

I think you will really be surprised how your needs are met if you don’t think about or talk about yourself so much. Now I’m not saying you should be a doormat, you do need to find the balance. I’m just saying, make someone a sandwich and see how it makes you both feel. You might be surprised.